I don't think that being nice and being assertive are opposite views. It's all about knowing your own boundaries and being sensitive to other people's boundaries. It's possible to be "nice" while at the same time tresspassing on someone's sacred cow, so rather than being overly considerate it might be better to be aloof while practicing listening at the same time.
As an example, the waitress who comes along and asks you how it's going 500 times during dinner might be being nice, but she's also annoying.
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Date: Saturday, 20 May 2006 09:09 am (UTC)I don't think that being nice and being assertive are opposite views. It's all about knowing your own boundaries and being sensitive to other people's boundaries. It's possible to be "nice" while at the same time tresspassing on someone's sacred cow, so rather than being overly considerate it might be better to be aloof while practicing listening at the same time.
As an example, the waitress who comes along and asks you how it's going 500 times during dinner might be being nice, but she's also annoying.