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da"And they covered up the sun
Until the birds had flown away
And the fishes in the sea
Had gone to sleep"
Excellent concert. Andy and Vince still know how to put on a good show. They played a lot of older songs, and only one d. and I agreed that we missed hearing ("Solsbury Hill", which if you haven't heard it, and you like the Peter Gabriel, you may enjoy as well).
We had dinner at Jamie Kennedy's Wine Bar, and watched our food be prepared mere feet away. Mmm, fresh french fries. Mmm, local asparagus with poached egg and hollandaise.
In all, a nice evening. I only wish I'd been able to go to a certain birthday party that also happened this evening, with two (relatively new) friends from Perl circles.
---
In the car ride down, d. and I discussed Focus on the Family and what would happen if they decided that sexual orientation wasn't a choice after all, and therefore they wouldn't need to try make those wacky "ex gay" claims. Essentially, conservative acceptance of conservative homosexuals (who find a single partner, settle down in the suburbs, and have kids). One of d.'s comments was that then their Focus would turn specifically to people who weren't "normal enough" and that might be worse than the current culture war. Particularly for trans and bi people.
And the current sharp division gives us a chance to develop a culture of our own, which has been good, in terms of people choosing their own culture, what parts people want to keep, etc.
I think that the current culture war, which is potentially re-enacted in every conservative family that has a G/L/B/T family member, isn't the only way we can develop our own culture. It could be less oppositional, possibly more constructive; possibly having more interchange with so-called straight people. What I'd really like to see is a greater Queering of straight culture. I don't know. That might happen when there's a concurrent arguement over whether gay people are choosing to be gay. But I don't think so, not as much as if people generally agreed that orientation wasn't entirely a choice.
But at the same time, I am quite worried that the religious right would concentrate on the people who "could" be "normal" but are much happier not being so.
Blah. Time for sleep.
Until the birds had flown away
And the fishes in the sea
Had gone to sleep"
Excellent concert. Andy and Vince still know how to put on a good show. They played a lot of older songs, and only one d. and I agreed that we missed hearing ("Solsbury Hill", which if you haven't heard it, and you like the Peter Gabriel, you may enjoy as well).
We had dinner at Jamie Kennedy's Wine Bar, and watched our food be prepared mere feet away. Mmm, fresh french fries. Mmm, local asparagus with poached egg and hollandaise.
In all, a nice evening. I only wish I'd been able to go to a certain birthday party that also happened this evening, with two (relatively new) friends from Perl circles.
---
In the car ride down, d. and I discussed Focus on the Family and what would happen if they decided that sexual orientation wasn't a choice after all, and therefore they wouldn't need to try make those wacky "ex gay" claims. Essentially, conservative acceptance of conservative homosexuals (who find a single partner, settle down in the suburbs, and have kids). One of d.'s comments was that then their Focus would turn specifically to people who weren't "normal enough" and that might be worse than the current culture war. Particularly for trans and bi people.
And the current sharp division gives us a chance to develop a culture of our own, which has been good, in terms of people choosing their own culture, what parts people want to keep, etc.
I think that the current culture war, which is potentially re-enacted in every conservative family that has a G/L/B/T family member, isn't the only way we can develop our own culture. It could be less oppositional, possibly more constructive; possibly having more interchange with so-called straight people. What I'd really like to see is a greater Queering of straight culture. I don't know. That might happen when there's a concurrent arguement over whether gay people are choosing to be gay. But I don't think so, not as much as if people generally agreed that orientation wasn't entirely a choice.
But at the same time, I am quite worried that the religious right would concentrate on the people who "could" be "normal" but are much happier not being so.
Blah. Time for sleep.
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no subject
Date: Sunday, 5 June 2005 02:55 pm (UTC)I don't believe that sexual orientation isn't always unchosen.[Why is that the right sentence, and not "I believe sexual orientation is sometimes chosen. Oh, wait, there were too many negatives the first time. Let's try again...]I don't believe that sexual orientation is always unchosen. I expect in some cases, it is; indeed, you and I know someone well who quite explicitly talks about her choice to be a lesbian. I don't think it was chosen in my case, but I don't much care anymore. I'm happy being queer. But in general, I like what you've written here.
random thoughts
Date: Sunday, 5 June 2005 03:55 pm (UTC)Re: less oppositional... yeah, agreed.
I've had a number of people over the years (most recently my ex-neighbor) tell me that meeting me and P had caused them to completely rethink their notion of how sharp the distinctions between gay and straight couples were, to realize that the sex of your partner doesn't define a "lifestyle." That's on the short list of "things I've done with my life that I'm proud of." (In my teens, Judaism played a similar role.)
Re: choice... you know, I've never understood this.
Did I choose to dislike the taste of blue cheese? No, of course not. Could I train myself to like the taste of blue cheese? Probably. Could I eat blue cheese if my culture required me to do so? Probably. Am I happier not doing so? Yes.
I realize that eating cheese is different in important ways from loving, or even having sex with, other people. But I get about equally confused by the dialog. It seems like people who talk about whether sexuality is a choice are really talking about something else and making noises with their mouths.
Re: random thoughts
Date: Sunday, 5 June 2005 07:04 pm (UTC)I don't understand it either. It's almost as if blue cheese were a symbol of the elect. If you don't like blue cheese, you're going to hell.
Never mind that Jesus, in fact, did not say "Blessed are the cheesemakers."